The Hanging (a poem)
It was a cool December night
Around 8:15 pm
When he found her
The love of his life
The mother of his children
Hanging
From a tree
In their backyard
It was busy December night
Around 8:17 pm
When my 911 line rang
And I picked up the phone
Only to hear the frantic screams
Of a distraught loved one
Screaming about
The woman he loved
Hanging from a tree in his backyard
With his daughter standing by
Tears began streaming
Unconsciously, uncontrollably
Down my face
As I talked him through CPR
After he cut her down
From the tree
On that
dark cool December night
She’s blue
She’s gone
He cried
As he realized saving her
Was a hopeless cause
Despite my feeble efforts
To give him hope
Then came the devastating questions
Where are the babies?
My heart sunk
As I heard those words
Cross his lips
I coached him as best I could
Trying to sound calm and collected
As he frantically ran through the house
Searching for his 5-month-old twins
Did you check the cribs?
The bathroom?
I asked
Barely controlling
My own panic and distress
Where are the babies?
Did she hurt them?
Dear God
Please don’t take her
And the babies
One can only handle
So much heartbreak
My head was pounding
Tears were flowing
When I finally heard units pulling up
Talking
to This poor distraught man
Who just found
The love of his life
The mother of his twins
Hanging from a tree
In their backyard
Dead.
I was walking outside
Sobbing
As they pronounced her
Over the radio
At 8:25pm
And began their search
For the 5-month-old twin boys
Who they eventually found
At a family members house
Not long after.
I imagined how she felt
Hanging from a tree
Struggling for air
Did she suffer?
Why didn’t anyone help her?
Didn’t they see her pain?
How did it get to this point?
Unfortunately, I knew all too well
How easy it was to hide
Hide the scars, the pain
Until it’s too late
I knew it could have
Just as easily been
Me
Hanging from that tree
On that dark cool December night
Dead.
I was already hanging once
From a closet door, I remember
The struggle to breath
Wishing it would just end
Believing the world really would be
Better off without me
How devastating it felt
How much my past
Haunted me
How much my depression
Clouded my reality
How come I made it
And she didn’t?
She was a mother
With 5-month-old twins
They needed her
I don’t understand
I never will.
It was 8:15
On a dark cool
December night
Three weeks before Christmas
When a 25-year-old mother of twins
Was found hanging in her backyard
It was 8:17
On a dark cool December night
Three weeks before Christmas
When I picked up the 911 call
That changed me
In ways I can’t begin to explain
It hit too close to home
Scared me
Because I knew I could be next
Prompted me to seek help again
Even though finding it
Was a journey
Which took longer than expected
It was 8:17
On a dark cool December night
Three weeks before Christmas
When I picked up the 911 call
That still haunts me
But may have saved my life
Yet again.
– Story written by Mary Jess, 33-year-old Floridia dispatcher. 2 years as volunteer EMT/6 + years as 911 dispatcher.